Alexander863

Oh, yummy, you might say.  He's tan and tattooed and ripped and teasin' me with his naughty bits. Wearing good manties, for sure (thems type are my favorite, btw).

But then this motherfucker had to start conversatin' with me.

Three days ago he messaged me and I never messaged him back because he's from Lakeland, Florida and I do not need to be wasting precious online dating time talking to someone unattainable (long distance is not an option at this point; a lady needs to get herself some and get it often).

He called me  "babe" in his first email, too.

And then last night, this is what happened:

(12:04:04 am)Alexander863:hey babe how r u

(12:53:21 am)Alexander863:hey sweetie whats up

Notice that almost an hour had passed.

I get an email:

baby u never write back and always sign out
  

What. the. eff.

he called me three different generic names that I feel belong solely to people who have an actual connection to each other. Babe, I could handle. Sweetie, it made me throw up a little in my mouth (memories of other men from my past, eek). But BABY is what I call someone I cherish, respect, and love. When a strange man calls me baby, I feel like punching him in the mouth. I'm not your baby. You are not my daddy.

And then there's this thing, that I "always sign out." First, it was the first time he'd attempted to IM me and I didn't respond to either message. And I know I wasn't logged out because I was creating awesome blogs last night. So he's being super creepy by calling me baby, and now he's acting like I signed out because of him. Please. You are not that important.

Funnier still, is this quip from his profile:

You should message me if: If your a hopeless romantic
And your not one of these desperate ones :)

Also, OkCupid lets you answer questions and then it gives you a percentage with whoever you are looking at as to how compatible the twos of yous are, based on how you both answered. Alexander and I are considered 55% ENEMIES. 55%! Why would you even waste your energy on someone who has a different world view than yourself?? For example, here are some questions we both answered:

Would you consider connecting with someone whose relationship status is 'seeing someone' or 'married'?

him: Yes to both
me: no to both

Should burning your country's flag be illegal?

Him: Yes
Me: No.

So, at this point, I'm thinking:
He has a completely different moral compass than me.
He is on a completely different political plane than me.
He lives in Fucking Florida.
He doesn't want the desperate type but comes across as such.


And he likes to refer to strange women he's never even talked to by sexualized pet names.

Of course, he's just thinking:
She is pretty.
She is online.









Dudes, dude.